I’ve been trying to both name and tame my chronic symptoms for days now. Why does it feel as if I’m on the stove simmering on the brink of a boil? I call it the covid funk. And from what I can tell, we all have it even though our symptoms may be different.
The Stepford Wives
Do you remember the iconic psychological thriller, the Stepford Wives.
Synopsis — Joanna and her family move from NYC to the quaint little town of Stepford, Connecticut. At first she’s curiously observant and then mesmerized by the perfect, gentile behavior of the other female residents. The Stepford wives clad in dresses, lipstick and pearls, happily and compliantly go about their day cooking, cleaning and serving their husbands. Joanna, can’t shake the discord she feels. Eventually she discovers the sinister truth that the Stepford wives have been replaced with robots.
Disconnect
And that’s it. I’m relating to Joanna. There is a disconnect between my head and my heart. I feel constant dissonance, an inauthenticity as I take my place in line, robotically wearing a mask because I’m told I’m saving lives. And maybe I am and in case I am, I’ll wear a mask. I can see how someone else may feel disrespected or even afraid of the person who doesn’t where a mask. Perhaps the non-mask wearer has a thoughtful reason perhaps he doesn’t. My point is NOT to make the case for masks or not … rather how can we all reconcile living within this tension. And it’s certainly not limited to this example. Do I just suck it up and stay silent? Do I sleep peacefully with my head under the pillow which is only possible if I turn off my brain?
My Challenge
I have struggled this week. My goal with my blog has always been to glorify God by living my faith transparently day to day. That goal has not changed. The version of this article is draft # 36 at least.
Because every one of us sits atop a passionate perch with responses and arguments and the perfect view of the truth, disagreement is a given. Without intention, we have blinders on that limit our ability to see anything objectively. But this pandemic hurts my heart and I’m guessing yours too. There is fall out on both sides. The covid funk infects each of us and has the potential to be deadlier than the virus.
Proverbs 4:23 Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.
In bible times people would fully appreciate this verse. They would never differentiate between the mind and the heart like we do today.
The Heart
The heart is the center of who you are as a person, including the source of your wisdom, thoughts, attitudes, emotions, motivations and will. At the unveiled and most vulnerable core of your being, God stakes His claim and gives you your eternal identity.
The word ‘heart” is prolific throughout the Bible, appearing over 1000 times. Repeatedly we are warned to tend to it and care for it. We are to wonder about it’s mysteries, and to ask God to search it and to cleanse it. Given the prevalence of this guidance throughout scripture, the way I see it, heart-work is foundational for a christian.
The heart is not only the epicenter of our being, it’s also the source for what happens with every other aspect of our life! It controls our mind, our tongue, our eyes, our ears, our hands and our feet. Guarding our heart is essential and the best remedy to the covid funk.
Elective Surgery
Would you like to be cured? Perhaps it’s time to plan some elective surgery, no appointment necessary. Invite God’s words to reveal what needs tending in your heart.
Hebrews 4:12 “For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart.”
Asking God’s judgment may seem risky or intimidating. But it’s mandatory for real and authentic freedom. He is gentle and good. Our Father is a skilled surgeon who wants to cut away anything that weighs us down, makes us sick, and leaves us on the stove simmering.
Come Holy Spirit
I have heeded my own advice. My elective surgery hasn’t been painless. But I see how my heart had become unruly and overgrown. With careless inattention I had allowed weeds to choke my hearts soft yet powerful center, the Holy Spirit himself.
What the Holy Spirit revealed to me may be very different from what He reveals to you.
My assignment
With sincere humility I reached out to another child of God whose views are in sharp contrast to my own. I asked about her covid funk symptoms and her frustrations and her fears. I listened. Her response first shocked me, but then healed me. It wasn’t the content of what she said that gave me pause, but rather a recognition that her thoughts are no longer nameless or faceless. Instead they connect to a real person with a real story who has real fears from her real perspective. Instead of anger or frustration towards her, I felt compassion for my friend, my sister in Christ.
And for the first time, since the start of this pandemic, my head is connected to my heart.
My Dream
I am not naive to the fact that dissension and divisiveness will continue to dominate our landscape, especially in this election year. No doubt, my heart will require constant tending. But just dream with me. What if each of us did the hard work proverbs 4:23 commands? What if everyone of us guarded our heart and invited the Holy Spirit’s conviction?
Maybe then… “they’ll know we are Christians by our love.”
For His Glory, Debbie Hucke
You are an amazing Christian and woman and I feel honored to be getting to know you through your blogs.
Sisters in Christ,
Toni
Oh sweet Toni…. you are one of my favorites. love you too. Cannot wait for a proper, sweet and safe hug. Debbie
Debbie, this is much needed for all of us in the season. Particularly with an election coming you have reminded me that Hearts differ drastically and it often seems easiest to just disengage from those who disagree with us. I vow, with the constant help of the Holy Spirit, to reach out to all of those around me who are hurting and in need no matter their beliefs regarding covid-19 politics, or anything else. I will add this prayer for help in this endeavor to my daily prayer routine. I have a new Christian friend here in Pagosa Springs and she and I differ in many ways. What cements our relationship is our strong faith in Jesus Christ as our Lord and savior and we disciple one another as we can while under lockdown. With her it has become easy to ignore our differences and focus on that most perfect connection, Jesus Christ. I should be able to do this with everyone. Thank you, once again, for always challenging our minds and for your complete authenticity
Terri, I wrote this while looking right in the mirror. This will take vigilance indeed. He never said it would be easy. But He does promise that it’s worth it.
This again was so excellent! Oh I can relate!!! More of You Jesus and so much less of me. I look forward to reading your blog! You bless me! Thank you!
Thank you kind friend. More of Jesus, less of me. What a selfless and effective thought.
Thank you for taking the time to share your eloquence and faith, echoing so many of my thoughts at this strange time in our lives. I hope you and your family are well in mind, body, and spirit.
Thank you Marybeth. I look forward to a proper hug and catch up. Debbie
Thank you for your words of truth! Part of my Covid funk is wanting the truth! The truth is in Gods word. With or without a mask we go without judgement of others remembering to love. These are uncertain times we are at war, but not with just a virus. The war is in our hearts without Jesus and the power of the Holy Spirit!
Indeed Jackie. Well said. We are at war. And the battle has been won. Amen.
Thank you and enjoyed the elective surgery for my heart today and will try and continue to hear these words. God bless you and keep you.
Thank you Merna. Amen.
Thank you Debbie. I know I have the Covid funk too. Mostly I am just tired of it. Sounds whiny doesn’t it? I need peace and assurance. I read again Philippians 4:6-9. It tells me to pray with thanksgiving. To rejoice in God’s presence. To focus my mind on good and lovely things. This requires the heart surgery you write about, and honesty. But sometimes when peace comes, it defies my understanding in the midst of pandemic. I must trust its author as he heals my Covid funk and my ungrateful heart! Thanks for your thought-provoking insights. We are all struggling during this time. May God give you his peace and keep you and your family safe.
Anne… I admire your faithful discipleship. Peace to you Anne.
How true these observations and thoughts are. I think this isolation and stress of conflicting news that constantly bombards us has created stress and has the tendency to emphasize our differences rather than unify us more times than not. Especially the frequent blame game. Let us please look to the comfort of God and our faith to pull us through.
Thank God to know the ultimate authority. Amen.
Thank you for following your heart! Well said! ????
His will over mine is a daily choice isn’t it. Thank you Cinda.
Dear Debbie,
Your writing speaks so directly to the heart…of things…to my heart (which is my 2020 word). These are such strange times and I find in myself a growing resistant spirit to the restrictions. Was just thinking earlier today of a dear Christian neighbor and how I might connect better with her, who is very different from me in much of her thinking, except for her love for Jesus and wanting people in our town to know Him. Your message today is from God’s heart to me. Thank you for your obedience to the Spirit.
Love to you,
Colleen
Amen Colleen. Bridge the gap. His will not ours. Thanks for your comment and your encouragement.
Thank you Debbie. I found “Elective Surgery” to be a warm source of encouragement this morning. Some days my heart is weighted down because I get discouraged with the limitations of our daily life during this pandemic. I need to be reminded each day that Jesus is with me, and I must focus of those words you use every time, “God’s Got This!”
Thank you for this blog.
It is indeed a labor of love. And kind responses and encouragement from readers is in a sense what gives me the fuel for my purpose. THank you.
God is in control of this situation. This election year will be very difficult. We must remember to let our love show to others. Thanks for your inspiration Deb
Amen Diane. God is in control. It sounds so cavalier… But… I’m sure thankful He’ll remain on the throne no matter what. We will indeed be tested. And love does prevail. Thanks Diane.
It feels to me like God has put all of us in His operating room to cut-away (ouch) all sin with His Holy surgeon’s skill and replace it with His Essential Love. All this without any anesthesia and a big injection of REALITY. Thank you God for your mercy and grace as you provide “nurse Debbie” with wise and comforting encouragement to help us through this process.
Thank you Glenda. I am pleased that this ministered to you.
At last I have a name for what I am feeling! You nailed it Debbie. I have struggled with the disconnect of the “reality” of my daily life and how my heart seems out of sync with God’s word. Many days when I read scripture or listen to christian music I still feel disconnected. I have started to say the Lord’s prayer first thing in the morning and at night list 5 things I am grateful for that day. Thank you for your honesty, submitting to the Holy Spirit and sharing this wonderful message this morning.
Socially distance hug to you, Debbie.
Toni M
Thank you Toni. And I’m reassured to know, I’m not the only one. keep knocking… the door will be opened. You’re definitely on the right track. Debbie
Spirit led blessings, Debbie, reminding us to look at each other with our hearts instead of our heads. It sure is hard sometimes, and exhausting! Especially in these days when I often feel like I’m on my last nerve. I find in your lesson a much more positive, and Spirit-led, way to go forward, with not against each other.
Thank you Dorma. Giving up your will is an hourly choice! so pleased we can walk through this together.
Deb, your heartfelt sharing has touched me in several areas of my life right now. The scriptures you shared are perfect! I keep rereading them over and over. I am struggling right now with a family crisis and I feel the need to say something but I believe the Holy Spirit is telling me to wait. But if I wait, the crisis has a propensity to end very deadly. I’m sure the words you shared will most certainly be with me for a long time. Thank you.
John 1:1. “In the beginning the Word already existed. The Word was with God, and the Word was God.’ The Word is life giving. Praying for your discernment. Debbie
I wrote a long reply earlier today, but I do not see it. I will try to write one again tomorrow.
Hmmm…. not sure what happened Sandi. For first time commenters I am sent an alert to approve and then you’re good to go. please try again.
On this national day of prayer, your blog was so perfect. My heart needs to be with the millions of people suffering with physical, emotional, spiritual, and economic pain. I feel so grateful that no one I know so far has been sickened by this virus. I am praying for good health for my family and my church family.
God bless you!
Amen Gerrie. thank you.
Love this Deb. And elective surgery is so much better than the emergency type–when God has to take us by the scuff of the neck to cut something ugly or destructive out! It seems that in life, we can elect to take His hand or prepare ourselves to be pulled through the bush backward. So glad he loves us that much!
I love that thought. Excellent. I hear my daddy’s voice as a naughty kid… “we can do this the easy way or the hard way.” Thanks Lynora. Debbie
Debbie thank you for sharing your heart! I feel like this process has made me start in fear, to anger, and than to trusting and than to more pruning and to more trusting! God has been showing me the importance of focusing on His truths since everything around us is “maybe true, maybe false!” He has also revealed to me the importance of guarding our hearts from anger, from confusion, from lies, from deceptions and has placed His light of truth, love joy peace, but it is a daily choice. The more clearly I see this the more I realize I long for eternity, and than the mundane worldly tasks so seem pointless! And I get what you are saying about everything feeling false and robotic. When heaven and eternity feel real, this world can feel that way! I am now praying for the discernment to live wisely in this “already been redeemed, but not yet…”
Hello Amber, Thanks for taking the time to comment! It does feel like we’re having to go through the stages of grief or loss. And that final step is acceptance… which for a Christian includes TRUST. Thank God He is a rock and never changing, dependable today and tomorrow. And I so agree with the tension of living in the now while longing for the not yet. I too am join you in praying for discernment. Stay the course Amber! Debbie